Memories
December 6, 2021
We all have those activities that help us create quality time with our children. For the Talleys it’s reading together. Each storybook I pull from our mini library is, in my head at least, a chance for the three of us to connect, grow a little closer to one another and create a memory not only of a tale we discovered but of a few quiet moments spent together. Being intentional with the time I spend with my boys is important to me.
There’s no question that taking the time to just be present with our kids can help them feel comforted, safe and loved at home. But despite our best intentions, it’s not always easy to find or set aside that time. In fact, planning intentional moments with our kids can feel like another task to check off our list during a busy day. Adding to this dilemma are those times when we make an extra special effort to create a memorable moment with our kids – but it simply falls flat. After we’ve gone out of our way to plan and prepare, the kids immediately start to fight or complain, and we vow never to do it again!
I’ve certainly been there. A few years ago I was inspired by Sarah Mackenzie’s insights in the Read-Aloud Revival about building relationships with kids through books. I had a perfect evening planned where we’d read Apples on the Oregon, and I picked up apple pies from McDonald's. My excitement and expectations were both way too high; the boys were only two and three. But I had my heart set on constructing a wonderful, memorable reading experience for all of us. Well, memorable it was – for all the wrong reasons. Neither son wanted to sit and listen to the book, and they HATED the apple pie. I was ready to throw in the towel on creating memories with reading. Thankfully, a tug on my heart warned me not to give up, and to keep showing up.
With social media at our fingertips, it’s also far too easy to fall into the comparison game when we see moms who seem to have the power to summon memorable moments at will. This perception seems exceptionally prevalent at Christmastime.
But none of that is the point. It’s really all about a meaningful connection, however simple or spontaneous. Sitting down and coloring with your kids, making a home-cooked meal or just taking time to listen can result in treasured moments for you and them. Lately, my boys have asked if I could sit by their bedroom door when they go to bed. One night my youngest, Liam, said, "Mommy, I want to just sit here and look at you." That sweet, tender voice made me realize that just being close to him in those moments is probably more meaningful than I imagined.
And there’s no reason we can’t keep trying to manufacture some quality time that’s a little more elaborate and intentional. The Talleys are reading a Christmas book every morning. After we finish the book, we put it under one of our Christmas trees.
I’m reminded from time to time that any time spent with our children is a beautiful opportunity from God that can evoke love, safety, laughter, warmth, importance and closeness. As we approach this Christmas season, what memories are you creating? And throughout the year, are you treasuring those chances to spend time together, whether they happen intentionally or organically?
Dear Heavenly Father,
Thank you for providing us time with our families to create memories! Be with the women who may feel burdened this season, for any number of reasons. We ask in your name that she will see hope during this Christmas season, and that it will be passed along as she forms a stronger bond with her children. Draw her near to your Holy Spirit and refresh her heart. Remind us all that we are your children, and that you are always ready to love and connect with us. Help us to follow that example in our lives.
